“There is no nation on this planet where men do more unpaid labor than women,” said Eve Rodsky, author of Fair Play: A Game-Changing Solution for When You Have Too Much to Do (and More Life to Live). Women still do more than two-thirds of domestic work despite advances in society, says Rodsky.

Lila Seidman, reporter at the Los Angeles Times, interviewed Rodsky during From Day One’s virtual conference focused on family health. Their fireside chat started with a screening of the trailer of Jennifer Siebel Newson’s documentary based on Rodsky’s book.

“I felt I was the default for every single domestic task in my family,” said Rodsky in the trailer. A mother, wife, and attorney, Rodsky was placed in a balancing act to manage her work and home life. Frustrated by the unequal domestic labor that was placed on her plate, Rodsky set out to research women’s labor in the household around the world. 

Righting the injustice of women’s unpaid labor requires more than verbal agreement from husbands. Instead, in her book and work, Rodsky enumerates the steps that are needed to save women’s well-being and maintain happiness in the home.

From her research beginning in 2011, Rodsky crystallized the requirements for healthy households: defined expectations, fairness, transparency, accountability, and trust. If one of these components is missing, the home becomes disharmonious and stressful.

Since the publication of Rodsky’s book in 2019, she has seen its impact around the world. Procter and Gamble sponsored her trip to the World Economic Forum where she spoke to an international audience. There she learned of similar movements in India.

The author also received “a wonderful message from politicians in Germany, who were realizing the difference in women’s labor force participation rates in the regions where kids have to come home for lunch versus when lunch is provided in schools.”

The ‘jar of mustard challenge’ was a scenario Rodsky posed in the countries she studied. Imagine that a woman asks her husband to go out and buy yellow mustard. She is specific because she knows her son will not eat protein without the condiment. Instead, the husband returns with brown mustard every time. Now the wife loses trust in her husband.

Women “cannot trust their husbands with their living will because they’re not bringing home the right type of mustard,” she summarized.

The author reflects on the impact of this one poorly executed task multiplied by the innumerable duties that comprise household work.

While male partners may assert that they are willing to bear the load of housework and childcare, in fact, they maneuver themselves out of considerable responsibility. “Women tend to under-report and men overreport” the amount of work they do, says Rodsky. “We need to invite men to their full power. Men have to do domestic work.”

The problem of women’s unpaid work appears in the workplace as well. It is analogous to a female worker’s assuming the burden of an office party and all that entails. Her colleagues expect her to produce the festivity by ordering balloons, the cake, issuing announcements, and more.

But how does one get both domestic partners to buy into Rodsky’s remedies? Seidman mentioned the deck of cards that the book Fair Play offers readers. These 100 cards represent tasks that are to be divided fairly. Once someone accepts a card, he or she agrees to complete it from conception to execution.

“It’s not only about fairness. It’s about ownership,” Rodsky said.

Francine Brevetti is a ghostwriter, author and editor at www.francinebrevetti.com.