Creating a Culture of Feedback: Embracing the Discomfort

BY Jessica Manley | December 11, 2023

In either the classroom or the workforce, everyone has received feedback at some point, whether constructive and effective, or unclear and confusing. Those who are in the position to give reviews are often uncomfortable with doing so, which can result in feedback that is ineffective.

“People need to know where they stand,” said Willie Jackson, partner and head of growth at ReadySet, a diversity strategy firm. Jackson led a thought leadership spotlight titled “Creating a Culture of Feedback: Embracing the Discomfort,” at From Day One’s recent Miami conference.

“There is something that I call the tyranny of niceness that pervades a lot of corporate cultures where we pretend everything is okay, we nod along, we don’t give people critical feedback, and then nobody actually knows where they stand.”

Incorporating a human-centered feedback approach can help workers feel more at ease in the workplace. Instead of receiving vague feedback that provides no real clarity on work performance, individuals benefit from open and professional communication, which can make them feel more secure in their roles.

How Feedback Can Impact Morale

Willie Jackson, partner and head of growth at ReadySet, led the thought leadership spotlight in Miami. 

When it comes to feedback, women are more likely to receive criticism not for their work performance, but for their personality and how they make other people feel. Around 76% of women have been told they’re too aggressive in their reviews, whereas only 24% of men received this criticism in an analyzed sample of performance evaluations conducted by The VMware Women’s Leadership Innovation Lab at Stanford University.

People of color also experience feedback that is not only less concrete, but also less authentic than that of their peers. Compiling facts and concrete evidence to support feedback is imperative to ensure efficient feedback is given to each individual, no matter their gender and racial identity.

Emotional energy plays a large part of how feedback is received. Regardless of how simple the feedback may be, if the individual giving the information is emotionally charged, the person will respond to the energy and not to the content of the conversation. Maintaining a relaxed disposition will help the review stay focused on the topic and not the emotions of the various parties.

How to Implement Efficient Feedback

Giving feedback is an unnatural and uncomfortable feeling for most people. It can be a hard conversation, and many find it easier to skate over the real issues than to face them head-on.

“Let’s say a direct report of yours sent a deliverable too quickly without it being reviewed, and it didn’t look great. Speed is important, but pausing to focus on quality control before sending can ultimately save us time.” Jackson offered an example of feedback in this situation, “‘Next time, please send me a draft before distributing, and we can talk through it together,’” he said.

“What I love about this framing, phrasing and language is that it acknowledges the mistake without dwelling on it,” said Jackson.

Jackson and his team at ReadySet have overcome this issue by using a system called FLIF, which stands for felt, liked, improved, and feedback. Before getting into detail about how to improve an outcome, they will go over how they felt, what they liked about the situation, what they would improve for next time, and finally, the feedback.

Telling someone, ‘Hey, let’s FLIF this out quickly,’ can help take away the awkwardness of telling someone they need to be given feedback, says Jackson.

Harm can also happen when giving feedback. “We also want to be equipped and prepared to repair harm in the event that it occurs,” said Jackson. After giving the person some time, it is essential to reach out to them to see how they are feeling after having digested the information and if they have any feedback for the reviewer. This shows the person their well-being is valued, and will help them avoid feeling that the conversation was punitive in nature.

Editor’s note: From Day One thanks our partner, ReadySet, for sponsoring this thought leadership spotlight. 

Jessica is a diverse writer and crochet enthusiast based out of Upstate New York.

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